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moirariordan) wrote2012-09-17 07:06 pm
moirariordan) wrote2012-09-17 07:06 pm
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day 3: metric shit ton of fruit-ing
Day 3, sort of - baked pork chops and peach raspberry kuchen! Better pictures this time because my mother's cell phone was not purchased in 2006, unlike other people I could mention (me).
pork chops, chop chop
seasonings - wild card! like the middle of your kink bingo card, only with salt and garlic instead of gangbang and dirty talk
2 eggs
1/4 cup flour
~2 cups of breading (another wild card! I used croutons + toasted almonds. You can also use those fancy bread crumbs or whatever, if you wanna be boring. And for my little siblings, I did a separate pan with Honeycomb cereal, because it's the only thing I could find in the pantry)
cream of mushroom soup
I'm posting this recipe mostly because it's the first one I've found that actually makes the bread shit stick to the meat and not just crumble away into a big gooey mess in the dish. I have been failing at this for a very long time, folks.
FIRST, rinse AND DRY your chops, chop chop, then put whatever seasonings you want (I like onion/garlic salt and Italian). Then dredge in flour, then in the beaten eggs, then in the breading.
You can sear these in a pan with oil if you want, that might help keep the breading from falling off. I skipped this step which might be why my breading stuck to the pan in the oven. Another fail, although not as messy as all my previous ones.
they look real pretty here, but you should be aware that my baking dish did not appreciate this bullshit at all
Bake at 350 for an hour (covered with tin foil). Then dump a can of mushroom soup on top (I used this organic stuff that's awesome). You can also mix in some white wine or milk if the soup is too thick. Then bake for another half hour. Yum yum.
the Honeycomb pork chop. It sounds completely disgusting, and it may or may not have been inspired by a dish at Planet Hollywood, but it's actually not that bad and whatever, my six year old brother dug it
Kuchen is just the German word for cake and it's super easy to make. And delicioso. Is that how you spell that? My Google Chrome spell check doesn't speak Spanish.
So here, I made one with fresh peaches (mmm, Iowan produce in the fall) and raspberry pie filling.
1/2 cup margarine/butter
1/4 cup white sugar
1 egg
vanilla extract (like a teaspoon or so)
1 cup flour
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 teaspoon salt
peaches, raspberries
other wild card seasonings - I used cinnamon, sugar, nutmeg, cardamom, & ginger
Grease/flour a pie/cake pan. Sift together flour, baking powder, salt.
In another bowl, mix melted butter/sugar until it's light and fluffy. Beat in egg, then vanilla. I also added some almond extract, too. Add seasonings, then the flour mixture. Mix it up, brother. (Add more flour/sugar if it's too wet - it should be like heavy, sticky dough.)
Spread the dough out on the pan with your hands, flattening it on the bottom and up the sides. Put in your fruit - it's really up to you how much. I used a metric shit ton of it. You can also fancy it up like I did, too.
pictured: a metric shit ton of fruit, with some Lysol food surface sanitizer in the background because I don't put shit away until hours later when I knock it over with my elbow. Note: the Lysol does not go in the food. Just FYI
Sprinkle more of your seasonings on top. I mixed some into the fruit filling, and then sprinkled more on top because I want the entire fucking thing to bleed cinnamon sugar. But that part's up to you. Then I put some almonds around the edges, on the part of the dough that's still exposed.
Bake at 350 for 35 - 40 minutes, or until golden brown. You're fucking welcome.
pre-bake and then what a slice looks like, if you take after me with the metric shit ton of fruit-ing. You can also reduce the amount of fruit and increase the amount of dough so that it's more cake and less huge gob of sugary fruit soup with some crust, and you can also fold the dough over on top, or bake the fruit into the dough, or whatever. There's like a billion variations you can do so go crazy and then compose a song of thanks to me in your head while you're eating. I also take donations.
pork chops, chop chop
seasonings - wild card! like the middle of your kink bingo card, only with salt and garlic instead of gangbang and dirty talk
2 eggs
1/4 cup flour
~2 cups of breading (another wild card! I used croutons + toasted almonds. You can also use those fancy bread crumbs or whatever, if you wanna be boring. And for my little siblings, I did a separate pan with Honeycomb cereal, because it's the only thing I could find in the pantry)
cream of mushroom soup
I'm posting this recipe mostly because it's the first one I've found that actually makes the bread shit stick to the meat and not just crumble away into a big gooey mess in the dish. I have been failing at this for a very long time, folks.
FIRST, rinse AND DRY your chops, chop chop, then put whatever seasonings you want (I like onion/garlic salt and Italian). Then dredge in flour, then in the beaten eggs, then in the breading.
You can sear these in a pan with oil if you want, that might help keep the breading from falling off. I skipped this step which might be why my breading stuck to the pan in the oven. Another fail, although not as messy as all my previous ones.
they look real pretty here, but you should be aware that my baking dish did not appreciate this bullshit at all
Bake at 350 for an hour (covered with tin foil). Then dump a can of mushroom soup on top (I used this organic stuff that's awesome). You can also mix in some white wine or milk if the soup is too thick. Then bake for another half hour. Yum yum.
the Honeycomb pork chop. It sounds completely disgusting, and it may or may not have been inspired by a dish at Planet Hollywood, but it's actually not that bad and whatever, my six year old brother dug it
Kuchen is just the German word for cake and it's super easy to make. And delicioso. Is that how you spell that? My Google Chrome spell check doesn't speak Spanish.
So here, I made one with fresh peaches (mmm, Iowan produce in the fall) and raspberry pie filling.
1/2 cup margarine/butter
1/4 cup white sugar
1 egg
vanilla extract (like a teaspoon or so)
1 cup flour
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 teaspoon salt
peaches, raspberries
other wild card seasonings - I used cinnamon, sugar, nutmeg, cardamom, & ginger
Grease/flour a pie/cake pan. Sift together flour, baking powder, salt.
In another bowl, mix melted butter/sugar until it's light and fluffy. Beat in egg, then vanilla. I also added some almond extract, too. Add seasonings, then the flour mixture. Mix it up, brother. (Add more flour/sugar if it's too wet - it should be like heavy, sticky dough.)
Spread the dough out on the pan with your hands, flattening it on the bottom and up the sides. Put in your fruit - it's really up to you how much. I used a metric shit ton of it. You can also fancy it up like I did, too.
pictured: a metric shit ton of fruit, with some Lysol food surface sanitizer in the background because I don't put shit away until hours later when I knock it over with my elbow. Note: the Lysol does not go in the food. Just FYI
Sprinkle more of your seasonings on top. I mixed some into the fruit filling, and then sprinkled more on top because I want the entire fucking thing to bleed cinnamon sugar. But that part's up to you. Then I put some almonds around the edges, on the part of the dough that's still exposed.
Bake at 350 for 35 - 40 minutes, or until golden brown. You're fucking welcome.
pre-bake and then what a slice looks like, if you take after me with the metric shit ton of fruit-ing. You can also reduce the amount of fruit and increase the amount of dough so that it's more cake and less huge gob of sugary fruit soup with some crust, and you can also fold the dough over on top, or bake the fruit into the dough, or whatever. There's like a billion variations you can do so go crazy and then compose a song of thanks to me in your head while you're eating. I also take donations.